Remember Who You Are
Danny —
You will forget this. You always do. The clarity you have right now — this sense of belonging, this rest, this peace — it will fade into the noise of a busy week, a hard conversation, a season of pressure. And you will start carrying the weight again. You will start trying to be strong.
So here is what you know right now. Write it down. Come back to it.
You gave your life to Christ as a teenager. And almost immediately, God let you fall — not to punish you, but to show you that you couldn’t stand on your own. You spent years building things. Good things, even. Businesses, leadership, a family. And more than once, God took what you built — not because it was bad, but because you were trusting in it instead of Him.
The pattern kept repeating. Seek God. Build something. Trust in what you built. Watch it fall. Surrender. Find Him deeper than before. Seek again.
You didn’t have language for this for most of your life. You thought you were the crazy one. People around you — good people, faithful people — would look at your peace and your lack of urgency and wonder what was wrong with you. You would look at their striving and their anxiety and wonder the same thing about them. You were looking at different things.
It wasn’t until much later — through Watchman Nee, through Tozer, through conversations you never expected — that you realized what you had been experiencing wasn’t crazy. It was the normal Christian life. It just isn’t common.
There was a season where the pressure of carrying all of this inside broke you. Physically. You couldn’t sleep. Your body shut down. Everything you thought you were — the strong one, the capable one, the one who sees clearly — was stripped away. And in that emptiness, you found something you didn’t expect. Love. Not because you were strong. Because you were finally surrendered.
You woke up a different man. Not a better man. A loved man. A man who knew he belonged to God — not because he got it right, but because God chose him anyway.
The journey hasn’t stopped. The walls still come. The surrender still deepens. God is still faithful. And you are still learning that the goal of this life is not success, but surrender.
So when the weight returns — and it will — remember:
You are not a teacher. You are not an expert. You are just a man who has been walking with God long enough to know that the journey is real, the walls are real, the surrender is real, and the love on the other side is worth everything it costs.
Seek Him. Even when you don’t want to change, ask Him to give you the desire. Surrender what He asks for — even when it’s the thing you built for Him. And let Him do what only He can do.
Be sanctified. Not by your effort. By His life in you.
You are not from here. You never were. But you are finally home.
Don’t forget.